Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Unsent Letter

*******,

It is suiting that I am writing the original copy of this letter that you will never knowingly read now from a place where we conversed, worked and became friends. It is weird to stand here now and think that this place which holds such importance to our meeting will never again hold us in the same capacity; yet such is life a collection of markers of things that we have passed. I now look back on how it has come to get to this point and the events that unfolded to create this infatuation I now have with you. I look at how easy it was to get to know you, to talk about things beside the mundane weather or how much one had to drink, how I got to know the tip of your iceberg, how I got to see what lay beneath your stunning exterior and see the beauty of your inner self. I found it easier to talk to you then I found to talk to anyone in a long time, I never felt threatened or that you would judge me, yet there was always a sense of tension I could feel as if there was something just laying beneath, but alas I am a coward and am writing this to no one and may never try to cross that line and break that tension. To be honest I am afraid and shy on acting on what I feel in fear of the many "What if's" that could occur, as well as the simple fact that if I do act and it fails the friendship will dissolve and I have nothing to show for it, as well I am respectful of your comments and took to heart the fact you do not wish to be involved in the Drama of a relationship at the moment and thought not to act upon it based on that, but rather develop a stronger base of friendship to not only test those waters of "What if" but also if nothing else become a better friend. I know I care about you, and wish to try, but for now I am a coward trying to slowly act in a game I am to unsure to play and by what rules to follow. If by chance you read this, and you do, please please help a thick headed guy out and let me know, till then I will work on my courage and maybe one day act. Take care

Sean